It’s not your birthday. It’s not your children’s birthday. It’s not your friends’ birthday. It’s not your co-workers’ birthday. It’s not our birthday. It’s the birthday of Jesus the Christ.

These were Malika Fortier’s words. She is my daughter, and these words were spoken in a holiday passion. She was challenging us to imbue ourselves with the spirit of Christ on Christmas, Christ’s birthday.

I have been uncomfortable with Christmas for many years. It’s not because of its religious significance but rather the absence thereof. The height of my discomfort usually came on Christmas Day at the home of my mother by marriage, Mrs. Ora Gaines, who has passed on. She was a great lady, and I loved her very much. She truly loved to give during Christmas. The gifts from her and others were always piled high. There were so many they seemed to touch the ceiling of her den. I was so uncomfortable I would ease away to another part of the house while gifts were being opened.

I am uncomfortable with Christmas because it’s so commercial. Everyone must spend a lot to demonstrate the Christmas spirit. Mrs. Gaines had little financial resources, so she would spend the following year paying for all the gifts she gave at Christmas. But she loved it so much, even though those to whom she gave had so much.

The commerciality does not start or end with the gifts. It starts with all the lights, trees and other decorations. It continues with the excessive eating and drinking. Then it continues after Christmas Day with the many unused and underused gifts.

Don’t get me wrong; my hands and heart are not clean. My wife, Faya Rose, gives way more gifts than anyone I know. I may not shop for them, but I help pay for them. And I don’t say a word. I eat more than my share and repeatedly thank the cook. I drink more non-alcoholic beverages than I should and enjoy every swallow. I see the extravagance and don’t lift a finger to object. I give a few monetary and other material gifts. I don’t object at all to my giving even though most are given to those who have much.

I am reminded of the passage in the Book of Matthew where Jesus said, “‘For I was hungry and you gave me food; I was thirsty and you gave me drink; I was a stranger and you welcomed me; I was naked and you clothed me; I was sick and you visited me; I was in prison and you came to me.” Then the righteous will answer him, saying, “Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?” And the King will answer them, “Truly I say to you; as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me!” Then the opposite is stated in summary: You did not give food and drink; you did not welcome the stranger; you did not heal the sick; and you did not visit the imprisoned. In as much as you did not give to the least of these, you did not do it for me! Christmas is not our birthday. It’s Jesus’ birthday.

I believe that Jesus wants our gifts. I believe that when we give to the least of these, we give to Jesus the Christ. Surely, he would want gifts for the least of these on his birthday.

We expect gifts on Christmas like it’s our birthday. If we really understood that it is not our birthday, we would not be disappointed that we did not receive the gift we hoped for.

We all have something to give because everyone is in need. It doesn’t have to be expensive. It does not have to cost any money.

In fact, it does not have to be material. It can be a word said, a smile revealed, a hand reaching out, a prayer voiced, a thought shared. Christmas is not our birthday. Therefore, we should give and receive in a way Jesus would find joy. It is not our birthday. It’s Jesus’ birthday.